Isn’t it ironic that while we all clamor about making our OWN choices and running our OWN lives thank-you-very-much, we tend to choose what is not best for us? Left to my own devices, my choices usually add up to a very little good and a lot of pain. I need to start evaluating my choices a bit better and not just asking, “What do I want to do?” but “Is what I want to do beneficial to me?”
Who hasn’t tried to drown their sorrows in chocolate or chips? Who hasn’t tried to cheer themselves up with Facebook time, a book, or huddling in front of the TV? Goodness—I even use knitting time to cope with stress! While these things are not evil in and of themselves, are they really benefiting me when I turn to them instead of God? I still tend to reach for my knitting when I want to come unglued, but I’m learning to take those quiet moments of forming the stitches to pray for the situation and my raging feelings instead of stewing over it. When I hear the cupboards screaming my name I’m learning to stop and ask myself, “Why? Why do I have this urge to eat?” Pretty crazy, isn’t it, to think that we can fix a broken and hungry heart with food for the stomach!
Imperfect progress, learning to make the choices that are beneficial instead of what I think I want. Lord, help me to desire Your ways above my own, and help me to rest in the assurance that Your ways are best. May I learn to use my free will for Your glory and to become the person You want me to be.